The number one reason why people don’t start on the path to getting something that they want — whether that’s a new body… a new career… a new relationship… or something else — is because they don’t know how to cure fear.
Because FEAR is what is holding them (maybe you?) back. Fear is what makes you think “what if it doesn’t work?”… “what if my friends find out and they laugh at me?”… “what if I succeed and then everyone hates me? I’m not comfortable being the “successful guy”!”
Fear is a killer of achievement.
Most excuses are just fear in disguise:
- I don’t have the time = I’m afraid of how hard it will be to give up the things I waste time on (T.V., etc)
- It’ll be too hard = I’m afraid of committing to something and how much pain I’ll have to endure
- I don’t know where to start = I’m afraid of being a beginner, how hard it’s going to be to learn, etc
- I don’t think that will work for me = I fear trying and failing/I fear being a success/I fear making a change/etc
Why Fear Is (Almost) Useless
Barring “smart” fear (like the fear of gravity keeping you from jumping off a building with no net or parachute) — most fear is useless!
Why do I say this? Because most fear is imagined, it’s not even real, it’s you sitting around and thinking of things that COULD go wrong or MIGHT go wrong — but that you have no real proof WILL go wrong.
Add to that the fact that none of us knows how things are going to turn out in any situation, and you see that fear is mostly just a useless emotion.
And if you’ve ever feared something, then started doing it, you ALWAYS realize the actual situation is a lot less fearful than you imagined it — that it’s not so bad/hard/difficult/uncomfortable/ — and maybe even a little fun!
How To Cure Your Fear
Action cures fear. Conversely, Not taking action only strengthens fear’s grip on you and chips away at your confidence. That’s the plain and simple of it.
There’s two steps to this:
1. Figure out what you’re afraid of and…
2. Take an action to fight it.
- Fear of losing your job to the recession — ACTION STEP: start talking to people in your industry… floating your resume out there… and exploring second income opportunities. You’ll feel more secure knowing there’s opportunity out there and who knows you may get an even better offer than what you have now?
- Fear of starting another diet/exercise program because it’s too hard — ACTION STEP: promise yourself that you’ll take it easy on yourself for this new diet/exercise program, that for just ONE DAY at a time you’re going to do it. So for today only, you’re going to make sure, come hell or high water, you get to the gym. When you focus on just one day — the task seems a lot smaller — ANYONE can do one day right? Our whole lives are just the sum of what we choose to do each day, in each small moment because little things add up.
- Fear of talking to that guy/girl you like — ACTION STEP: just say “hi” with a smile on your face. I guarantee she will NOT bite your head off (literally or figuratively). Once you see how nice people are if you’re nice… you’ll build some confidence and be ready to take it from there…
Just Take Action on SOMETHING Now
The key is to do something now because each small, little, seemingly insignificant action step you take is:
1. Building upon the previous action step (small things add up, kaizen principle) and…
2. Each time you do something, you beat down fear and install more and more confidence in yourself that you’re able to conquer fear and take action…
“Do The Thing You Fear The Most, and The Death of Fear Is Certain” — Mark Twain
Ole Marky was right, if you do the thing you fear (even if it’s just small “doing”– a small action step) then you’ll find that your fear will magically die. That’s a good thing.
So there you have it, just two simple steps to how to cure fear — so get started NOW and don’t let anything stop you!